$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
okay pat passed out under dana's car
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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