The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
