If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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