fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
