maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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