Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
