i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
