I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
