I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I think a kid would responsible me up
50% drunk capacity currently
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize