super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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