I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Randomize
