never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Edward fifth and chaser hands
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
