I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I don't deserve a penis
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
