We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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