I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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