i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
this boner is exhausting
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
A bitchslap is in order.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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