how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
