weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize
