Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Randomize
