I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Randomize
