Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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