the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
the liver wants what the liver wants
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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