I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Randomize