He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
