***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
Randomize
