I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Randomize
