scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
