Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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