This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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