So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize