I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
