you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
