I'm going to rape someone's good day.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
