Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
