You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Randomize
