hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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