how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
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