Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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