I love watching others lives come down to our level.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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