idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
