also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
