if i died would you start the facebook group?
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
