god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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