pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
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