Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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