id be glad to
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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