Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
