Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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