Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
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