You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
