He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
